GALILEO’S MOVING BRA

“Professor Einstein,” I asked, “are there any other systems you know of which may assist the informed crapshooter into realizing his goals?”

“Of course. But, first let’s get another round of drinks.” We were sitting at the long white marble bar at the Golden Nugget in downtown Las Vegas. The casino itself is brightly lit and well-appointed, making for an airy, free atmosphere in which the gambler may indulge his proclivities…Einstein called over the bartender and ordered a benzine and tomato juice over crushed ice, while I got my usual bottle of beer.

“I am sure,” he began, “that you know of Galileo, the great Italian astronomer and physicist who faced down the Roman Catholic Church and proved that Heliocentrism was a fact, not heresy. But, you probably did not know that he was a transvestite. A skinny fellow with bad teeth, halitosis, acne and long greasy black hair. Outwardly, he wore men’s clothing, but beneath that tunic and codpiece were the cutest little silk panties, lace teddies and bright red bras. Like most transvestites, Galileo looked at the world in terms of lingerie. He was also a rabid crapshooter, and consequently developed a style of play which allowed him to profit from his two obsessions. He called his system the MOVING BRA. Here’s the play:”

“He’d walk up to a table, any table, bypass the comeout roll and wait for a point number to be rolled. Whatever the point was, Galileo would simply visualize the cup of his bra covering it right on the layout, and the other cup of his bra covering another number. For example, if the point was four, he’d bet four and six; if the point was five, he’d bet five and eight; if the point was six, he’d bet the on the six and nine; and if the point was eight, he’d place the bet on eight and ten. Had he been a fatter guy, he might have had to space the numbers further apart. But, since he was a 28A he arrived at this configuration, starting out by placing the point (no pun intended) along with another number, whose only relationship to the point being that it was arrived at by the distance between his nipples.”

He took a sip from his drink, made a face and got the bartender’s attention, complained of a short pour on the benzine and was told that they were out of benzine, but had plenty of turpentine. He acquiesced and ordered a top shelf Red Devil over ice with a dash of clam juice. He continued:

“Galileo’s real genius here is in moving the numbers: say the point was six, then his play was to place the six and nine. If the six hit right back, he was a winner, pocketed the chips and awaited the next point. If the nine got hit, he’d stay on the six - nine for one roll only, hoping for a string of nines to be rolled, or the point of six. If neither number hit right back, he’d simply instruct the dealer to remove his bra from the six - nine to the eight - ten, and if no hit again, he’d have his bra removed to the four - six, and so on. Whenever his off point number was hit, he’d stay on that combination, pocket his first win and then press if the number was rolled again, and wouldn’t unhook himself from the combo until it stopped paying. He’d also regress his bets back down to one unit each if a pressed bet didn’t come in, which is excellent money management.”

“I’m not sure I understand the advantages of this system, Professor. Why not just place the six - eight which have a total of ten possibilities, as opposed to the four - six or the eight - ten, which each have only eight ways of showing?”

“The MOVING BRA system has the advantage of allowing the player to search for numbers which become hot. Many crapshooters play the six - eight combo as if it were a religious certainty, only to go bust in the end because they weren’t showing on the dice. Galileo was able to play all the numbers on the layout, albeit at different times, at a cost of two units instead of six units, employed a money management system that allowed him to press/regress and pocket chips often enough to retain a high-powered Milanese Law Firm that sued the pantyhose off the engineers who screwed up the Leaning Tower of Pisa.”

THE BETS: 3 - 6, 5 - 8, 6 - 9, and 8 - 10.

BYPASS COMEOUT ROLL.

PLACE THE POINT AND IT’S COMPANION NUMBER.

POINT HITS, BEGIN AGAIN AND ESCALATE BETS 50%.

OFF POINT HITS - POCKET FIRST WIN AND GO AGAIN.

OFF POINT HITS AGAIN - PRESS TO TABLE LIMIT.

NO HITS -MOVE UP THE SERIES.